Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

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Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Echelon » 02 Dec 2008, 22:15

My favorite is:

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. NachoDuck » 03 Dec 2008, 02:07

Haha, I thought this one was quite good:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. Coxy » 03 Dec 2008, 10:34

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris' computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby r3loaded » 03 Dec 2008, 12:58

A parking space with a handicapped sign does not mean that this space is reserved for handicapped people. It means that it belongs to Chuck Norris, and you will be handicapped if you park there.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby illstopemfloppin » 03 Dec 2008, 17:38

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby stethor » 03 Dec 2008, 18:16

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. CIH » 03 Dec 2008, 21:35

Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger by yelling "BANG!"


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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. G » 03 Dec 2008, 22:37

Chuck Norris can divide by zero
When people ask me "Plz" just because it's shorter than "Please" - I feel perfectly justified to answer "No" because it's shorter than "Yes"
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Kharnac » 03 Dec 2008, 23:35

the film 'Alien vs Predetor' was originally entitled 'Alien and Predetor vs Chuck Norris', but the director was forced to cut Chuck from the film, as he had realised noone would pay £6 to watch a film that lasted fourteen seconds.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby bigape1960 » 04 Dec 2008, 09:01

GTFO. G wrote:Chuck Norris can divide by zero


Ooooooh - deep :o
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. Cole Scuttle » 04 Dec 2008, 14:49

Chuck Norris is. Just accept it.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby diz » 04 Dec 2008, 16:28

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby SocratesVonGotham » 05 Dec 2008, 16:45

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby illstopemfloppin » 05 Dec 2008, 18:44

Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Tenchi » 06 Dec 2008, 01:21

GTFO. G wrote:Chuck Norris can divide by zero


Hahaha! :lol:
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Jeppe » 06 Dec 2008, 18:17

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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby sheep » 13 Dec 2008, 21:04

Well not facts but they fit here


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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Paradigm » 30 Dec 2008, 15:00

Chuck Norris is so much of a man, there was no egg during his conception.
You're one smart motherfucker, that's right.

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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby Echelon » 04 Apr 2010, 20:53

bumping this :)
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. Celtickiller » 04 Apr 2010, 20:59

I AM CHUCK NORRIS !
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby BraWndO » 04 Apr 2010, 21:45

Jesus can walk on water,but Chuck Norris can walk on jesus
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. Jamie » 05 Apr 2010, 23:09

chuck norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun
- "we need a spy killin GTFO.J !!!"
- "kill that fuckin sniper"
- " GTFO.J this is the first you've fucked me like this. and i dont like it"
- " fuck this, dont we have a sniper whom ping is less than 50 to take out gtfo.j????"


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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby DataStorm » 06 Apr 2010, 04:00

You know that he cannot turn on his belly when sleeping, cos chuck norris is stronger than Viagra.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby plodgeface » 14 Dec 2011, 19:44

Holy thread revival batman....

If Chuck Norris is that good and 'all powerful' he would come to my house and slap my head against the keyboaj23oj423oiuh4j32j14kkj2134kj13
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby GTFO. Loser » 14 Dec 2011, 19:54

plodgeface wrote:Holy thread revival batman....

If Chuck Norris is that good and 'all powerful' he would come to my house and slap my head against the keyboaj23oj423oiuh4j32j14kkj2134kj13


This was on my mates Facebook yesterday lol

Laughed so hard lol
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby PpJt » 15 Dec 2011, 01:14

Chuck Norris once got an erection while walking down a busy high street.

There were no survivors.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby kugs » 25 Dec 2011, 06:12

Chuck Norris' member is so big that even Plodge can't get a good shot on his super plane cam lens.
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Re: Post Your Favorite Chuck Norris Fact

Postby plodgeface » 25 Dec 2011, 14:08

kugs wrote:Chuck Norris' member is so big that even Plodge can't get a good shot on his super plane cam lens.


Happy Christmas Kugwash!! <3
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